my son preparing me dinner
what’s he making?
my favorite food, dense plastic bricks
my son preparing me dinner
what’s he making?
my favorite food, dense plastic bricks
I was "born" with eight extra teeth so when I was 15 I got them pulled and now I have them in a bag nailed to my bedroom door
Why is “born” in quotation marks? Were you brought into this world elsewise? Why did you nail them to your door? Is it a kind of symbol? A warning? A… fetish? Everything about this ask is extremely upsetting. Thanks so much.
there are so many important elements to this. the slow-mo. the sliding on snow in trainers?? the string classical music. the knowing glance towards the camera. the slight raise of the mug in salutation. the book. the red dressing gown. the snowflakes falling past. the hair? the blink as they turn away. who are they
Most heroes of progression are never mentioned in history books.
me comforting my mullet husband and assuring him that he is still masculine after he had to see another mans butt cheek
this is an image with a lot of power and while my instincts are telling me to lean into it I don’t feel like the life I’ve lived to this point has equipped me to do it safely
Blazer has that posture that says “i gotta chase you” but not “i wanna catch you”
SMALL TALK TIP FOR PEOPLE WHO HATE SMALL TALK: Ask people if they have any pets. This is light and impersonal enough to offend no one. People who have pets are usually pretty excited to talk about them and show off pictures, so there’s a good chance that you will be looking at kitties and doggos. People who don’t have pets will usually talk about the pets they wish they had, or have had in the past. People who neither have nor want pets are pretty rare.
It’s a neutral topic to talk about but be prepared for the weirdest shit. I once spent an hour listening to a financial manager who kept tropical velvet earthworms
that sounds like an excellent reason to try this strategy
Her name is cheese onion
I have an irrational fear that my future relatives will be able to unlock my memories through DNA (like in Assassin’s Creed) and will just watch me masturbate to some weird shit
whatW WHAT
gotta love roller coaster tycoon
i like this video because its a relic of the Before Times, like i love the 6-second cinematography that goes into vines but sometimes we forget the value of delayed gratification
i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do
Wtf????
Smoove with it too
This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters.
“Pathetic. You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”
reminds me of this gif
Baseball players are to be feared
Reblogging for the last one
^Same for me
They just kept getting progressively more “woah”
much woah
Oh my god this is a lucky universe
If I ever doubt myself I just ask “WWDDOOTDDD?” (What Would Doug Dimmadome Owner Of The Dimmsdale Dimmadome Do?)
my life is like Chopped except it’s God up there going “here’s a set of 4 mystery ingredients: some form of illness, zero disposable income, an ambiguous sense of self, 4 day old pasta….. you have 30 minutes to come up with some sort of life, with quality. ice cream machine broke”